Feeling it

For weeks I have confined myself to the house, shades drawn, to escape the heat and humidity. Occasionally daring to leave the house, I hurry to the car and crank up the air conditioning. Now that it’s almost September, I realized that I have barely been outside all summer. So with incredible courage (drama queen!) tonight I turned out the lights and sat outside in the dark, simply breathing and looking at the night sky.

I had nearly forgotten what a summer night feels like. I grew up without air conditioning. How could I have forgotten the feel of summer? Tonight I let my bare arms and legs be sacrificial lambs to the over-abundant mosquito population, without moving or swatting them away. The planet in the western sky (Jupiter? Venus?) was the only light in the muggy sky. Street lights were encased in a soft mist. Crickets sang. I wish I had seen the bats that I usually see at sunset but they were hidden in the darkness.

I just breathed and soaked in what a night in late August feels like. Like this. And I looked at the sky and silently said, “Lord, help me to accept what is. Give me the strength to be present. When I need comfort and support, when I need to trust you in the hard times, please be there. When I rejoice in the good times, let me remember to be grateful. No matter what, let me walk through life with my eyes—and my heart—wide open.”

If tomorrow morning I am covered in mosquito bites, I may consider myself a fool. But for now, I am glad I had the opportunity to feel a summer night.