So I read scripture to try to make sense of it, to find some solace for my aching heart. I read 2nd Corinthians, the section about Paul’s “thorn” in which Paul asks God to remove the thorn but God says no, the thorn stays. God’s words to Paul:
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. 2Cor 12:9
I think about God’s response and how I can find some peace in His words. I suppose the Lord’s power is being made perfect because of my own incredible weakness. As if His power could be any more perfect. So glad I can help, that I can do something to make Him beyond perfect. Just doing my part being incredibly weak. But I digress. . .
For me, this message should be my mantra—“my grace is sufficient for you.” This is God comforting me when I feel the sadness, the loss, the anger, the endless questions about His plan and His goodness in light of this horrible human tragedy. My brother gets killed, it hurts, and I look to heaven and remind myself that He said His grace is sufficient.
So I suspend my lack of understanding. Nothing changes what happened. If I’m angry with God, disappointed in a life full of things that seem unfair, nothing changes. But if I trust the Lord, it changes my heart, it gives me peace beyond understanding because He has said to me, directly to me, “My grace is sufficient for you.”
Miss you, little brother.